November 22, 2024 03:54 AM

Gluten is Good For You!

It seems gluten is America's public enemy number one. It's more dangerous than Al-Queda and harder to avoid than the NSA. There are gluten-free beers, restaurants, breads, hippy communes, and cruises. But few people know what gluten really, except that it makes pizza, pasta and beer delicious and it gives people with Celiac's disease, a mere one (1!) percent of the population diarhea, headache and cramps -- I say just stop eating at Pizza Hut.

In recent years, the gluten-free market has bloated to over $10 billion and market research firm Mintel predicts it will skyrocket 48 percent to $15.6 billion in 2016. So either people with Celiac's disease or gluten sensitivies are spending all of their money hand over fist for sub-par waffles, or the hordes of conformivores flooding the grocery stores is getting out of hand.

The processes in the body are incredibly more complex than we understand yet, and it's incredibly obvious in the way we interact with everything from food to prescription drugs. If you're trying to live a gluten free lifestyle because it truly makes you feel better, go right ahead. If you have Celiac's Disease, bummer dude, but if you don't please stop making your friends prepare you a special plate of gluten free pasta with a side of guild for living a gluten-ous lifestyle just because you want to practice an ill-advised exclusion diet. You're not special. You're a human being. Eat your dinner and quit complaining.

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Diet, News
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